Sometimes we feel stuck, we feel alone, we feel lost, and like we are going to be in this one really hard moment of our life forever. Then we cry. Or we laugh. Or we put on some music. We talk to a friend. We talk to somebody we love. We talk to somebody who means a whole lot to us. We watch a funny youtube video. We tell a joke. Or maybe we just fall asleep and wait for the moment to pass. We drive or watch TV. We get some food or have a glass of wine. We write or we walk.
We remember that the world is immense and we are absolutely never actually alone.
We feel ugly on Wednesday and beautiful on Thursday. We felt fat yesterday and skinny tomorrow. We are hot one second and cold the next. We like our shoes today and tomorrow we think they make us look like a clown.
We are the collective group of people called humans. We feel. We are not an “I” and we are not “them” or “us” or “him” or “her”. When I write I say “we”. Because we are the people. We all have struggles. He has struggles and so does she. So do you and I. Which is why I always refer to the people as we. We can all relate.
I may not use proper english all the time or follow writing guidelines that I have been told I should, but what I say is meaningful and is relatable to the whole world of “we”‘s.
What is the point of following the rules all of the time. If we all did, they would never be broke and we would never learn change. Change is a constant in this universe. Always. It will always be there. Change your hair, your clothes, your boyfriend and your location. Change where you live, where you go and how you live your life. Promise yourself that you won’t live your life exactly the same for the rest of your time on this earth. That is so boring. Get a different haircut, gain a few pounds, lose them, make new friends, stop wearing makeup, then wear it again. Try different coffee. Be unhealthy and then realize how much better you feel when you are healthy. But remember how awesome it was when you are a doughnut.
Date the wrong dude. Live in the wrong place. Get a haircut that made you cry for a second. Run instead of walk. Stand up for yourself. And then don’t. Be vulnerable. See where that takes you. If you regret a couple moments or even years of your life, you can make a change.
Nobody really knows what they want to do with their life.
We stress out about what we want to do or what we are supposed to be doing, but the brutal and honest truth is that we are all in the same boat. We don’t know what we want to do. We convince ourselves that everybody else has their shit together. We see confident people in suits walking down the street and immediately assume they love their job, they are great at what they do and know what they are doing with their life. We see cute couples in coffee shops who we assume are deeply in love and so happy together. They probably have awesome jobs, do everything together and plan on having a big happy family.
These are assumptions. And when we make assumptions that put other people on a pedestal with a shining light on them, and greatness beaming from their eyes, we belittle ourselves and tell ourselves that we are not good enough. We convince ourselves that we are a mess and that we have no idea where our life is headed. Unintentionally, we degrade ourselves and make ourselves sick with fear, anxiety and feelings of self doubt. When we lack self confidence and we allow self doubt to control our decisions we drown ourselves. We drown ourselves in the pool called society. We blind ourselves to the massive swarm of other drawing souls, and assume that we are alone in this pool. When in reality we are all drowning a little bit.
All of us who make assumptions about other peoples’ happiness, achievements and life decisions are drowning together.
We can sink or swim in this crazy world, but if we choose to swim and we choose to encourage other people around us to swim, we can diminish the population of drowning citizens who lack self confidence, and we can create a force of strong, confident people who don’t have their shit together or know what they want to do with their lives, but a strong force of people who appreciate and accept the feeling of not knowing what tomorrow will bring.
When we realize that maybe that confident guy in the suit is not on his way to his perfect job, that maybe he has been unemployed for six months, and he is on his way to his fifth interview of the week, and maybe the cute couple in the coffee shop is not happily married, but the women has been divorced twice and cannot get pregnant, and the man recently lost his job, but they get by because they love each other and need each other, maybe we can begin to accept the flaws in our own lives, and quit painting a falsified picture of perfection for the rest of society.
Quit making assumptions, because maybe that old saying “When you assume, you make an ass out of u and me.” has its truths and is made valid each day. Accept that you make choices that steer your life everyday. Don’t waste an opportunity for greatness due to pure and poor judgement, because it will bring you down, and you might bring others down with you. If we let everybody drown, who will stay afloat to see what tomorrow brings?